Tuesday, 23 March 2010

There's No Place Like Home

Today my body kinda feels like its giving up on me, yesterday was quite a difficult day, I left work early as I was very close to having a panic attack and was really struggling to calm down. I've not felt that out of control of my body in a long time and its a bit of a shock, I still feel like I'm in 'Fight or Flight' mode now and I'm not too sure how to stop it.
I'm feeling a bit like life has caught up with me, after I ignored what I was saying about just taking Baby steps and tried to take some steps I really wasn't ready for.
I'm still happy though, a bit emotionally drained but happy, things are changing for the better and I'm trying to look forward.

A big decision has been made in the past week or so, I'm going to be giving up my house and moving back to my parents.
This house has been my home for 19 years now (the house was our family home and where my sister and I grew up, my parents bought a new place just over a year ago, they moved out and rented this house to me) but I cant afford to stay here and the good memories of growing up here have been tainted by what happened at Christmas.
I wanted this to be the house I raised a family in but I don't think I could share this house, my home, with somebody else now.

I'm sad to be leaving this house but it really is for the best, I'll be able to start over properly and work out what I want to do.

With every end comes a new beginning and a new adventure, so with that in mind, roll on the next few weeks and...

'The New Adventures of MissSearles'

(has to be said in a Superhero style voice)

Photo credit - Google Images
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